We Let It Happen

Here is just one picture of Aleppo, taken recently. If you have the stomach for it, stop right now and google “Aleppo.” Better yet, I’ve done it for you. Just click here. Look at just a few of the pictures of that once beautiful city. No really, do it now. I’ll wait for you.

Well, you’re back. This was a city of over 2 million people. Now, a large part of it is rubble. Its people, at least in  a large part of the city, have all been killed or forced out. Estimates of deaths range from 300,000 to half a million people. Kinda like they just killed every person in Cleveland. Or Denver. Or New Orleans.

And we let it happen.

I’m not an expert on foreign affairs. And I don’t know all, or even most of the details of the war in Syria. And I don’t know if I should blame Obama for this or not. But it sure seems like the US should have done more to prevent this. And I’m pretty sure that not helping will be the biggest regret of his presidency. Yes, I know we’re already in two wars, and most Americans don’t have an appetite for a third. So, for whatever reason, we ignored a genocide.

But I do know this. Syrian forces were completely backed by Vladimir Putin. Yes, the same guy that Trump and his buddies now call “friend.” Go and take a look at those pictures again, and tell me if someone responsible for that is one you would call “friend.” And no, this isn’t some left-wing wacko conspiracy theory. Putin IS behind Syria’s forces here, and there’s no question about it.

And I also know this. Many thousands of people were killed, including hundreds of thousands of children, but many also lived. Now, where are they supposed to go? Not here in the USA, apparently. Because according to most people in this country, we don’t want them. Apparently, that would be foolish. We don’t want to deal with them. Because they might take our jobs. Or they might be terrorists. Or something. I’ve even heard people say that “they should just go back where they came from.” Look at those pictures again.

Where are they supposed to go?

But what makes me so infuriated, is that only 18% of Republicans support accepting Syrian refugees. Yet most of these Republicans identify as Christians. Yes, Christians. The same ones who happily talk of “The Good Samaritan.” And swear by Matthew 25: 31-46. The key passage here:

44 “They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’  45 “He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’  46 “Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life.”

I’m a Christian, and this confuses me. I know that accepting refugees has a lot of problems associated with it. Where do they live? Will they take my job? Will there be criminals or terrorists? I get it. But I also know the good Samaritan took risks, but he helped anyway. Which was pretty much the point of the story. Do I want refugees living in my house? No. But in my town? Yes, I think we could do that. At least we should. As Christians, I think we’re called to do that.

Still, if it came down to it, would I put my money where my mouth is? I don’t know. Or am I no better than those that I’m criticizing? I honestly don’t know. It’s easy to sit in my warm living room and write an angry blog. When it comes to helping, how will I do?

I don’t know the answer to any of this. But I know that as Americans we have just watched one more piece of genocide go by, while we merrily do our Christmas shopping and speak of Peace on Earth. And worry if Obama is still going to take away our guns. Or if some of our taxes are going for healthcare for some lazy guy who doesn’t want to work. And we really don’t seem to care about the Syrians. After all, they’re not Americans. Most of them are Muslims, so they don’t really matter. (sarcasm intended)

It’s no wonder so much of the world thinks Americans are arrogant and selfish.

Because apparently,  a lot of us are.

Crybaby or Patriot?

One thing I think we can all agree on, is that this was not a normal election. Some people were elated with the result, some were decimated. Almost nobody took it casually.

But it hit some people harder than others. Some were stunned, some cried, some just couldn’t seem to make it into work or class the next day. And since the election, I’ve seen approximately 1 bazillion articles and posts saying things such as:

• Stop your whining.
• Pull up your big girl panties and get to work.
• Spoiled brats who didn’t get their own way act like 2 year-olds.
• When (something bad) happened to me, I functioned just fine. Weakling!
• We won, you lost - deal with it.
• …

And to a point, I understand the sentiment, if not the tone, of those responses.  Yes, we should all be strong enough to go on. I mean, it's just an election. Nobody died! But let’s look at it another way.

On Wednesday after the election, one Hillary supporter I know started driving into work. But she couldn’t stop crying. Not knowing how to function in her job, she turned around, went to a friend’s house and they pretty much consoled each other all day.

Crybaby, right?

Let me share with you just some of what this person said on Thursday, one day later.

This election has hit me pretty hard, and it's taken me some time to process it. I've found it helpful to think of things I can do, rather than what's out of my control, and I thought maybe sharing my thoughts might help some of you too. 

1. I can pray for our leaders, our country, and everyone who calls this country home. 
2. I can recognize my privilege as a white, straight, middle class, educated, Christian and be an ally to all the people who don't benefit from the privileges I take for granted. 
3. I can spread positivity, kindness, and acceptance to everyone who crosses my path. 
4. I can donate my time and money to organizations that support the causes I'm worried about such as the ACLU, the Sierra Club, the Southern Poverty Law Center, the Trevor Project, and Planned Parenthood. 
5. I can stay engaged and informed and reject feelings of defeat or apathy. 

Nowhere did she talk about how SHE was being hurt by this election. In fact, when you read it, she was worried about others in this country and how she could help them. The popular narrative right now is that these crybabies just were upset because they didn’t get what they wanted. That’s not the case here.

And she’s not alone. I talked to one man who was distraught, and his thoughts were similar, and he even added “I might be OK, but what about all the people who could really suffer in the next four years? What about them?”

I could give more examples, but you get the idea.

You can say these people are over-reacting. I don't agree, but we can have different opinions. Still, they weren’t so much worried about themselves, as they were worried about others in this country. Isn’t that what we want people to do? And how is that not patriotism? Patriotism comes in many forms. Flag waving is one. But caring about and helping people in our country is another. And probably a more productive one.

Sure, Facebook and much of the media are fixated on a few of the actual crybabies who were only upset because of what THEY wanted. But Facebook stories do not represent reality, and every single person who I talked to who was upset by this election expressed themselves as remorseful for others in the USA.

They’re not crybabies, they’re patriots. And they should be treated as such.

Can We Change the World?

Can I change the world? Do I want to? How about you?

I’ve thought about this a lot. And yes, I think I do. I’ve had a great life, so far. And a great career. And I’m happy to be retired. I loved teaching, and it defined who I am, or was. But I’m done with that now, and I’m not sure I could ever go back into the daily grind again, even if I wanted to.

But I miss making a difference.

I’ve been out of teaching for over three years, and as this time has progressed, it has become clearer and clearer to me, that I really miss making a difference. It’s not about personal recognition, or pats on the back. At least I don’t think so. No, it’s really that I’m too young for the Lazy Boy, yet too old for the classroom. And right now, I have a good life, friends that care for me, a church that appreciates me, and a woman who loves me. Yet I still feel like something is missing--and that “something” is “making a difference.”

There’s many ways I’m trying to correct that, but one, a small (tiny?) one, is my GrayShift blog. I’m not a professional writer, and while I would love to work for the Washington Post (!) I don’t think that’s going to happen. So I put my thoughts here.

While my blogs may not sound professionally written, and not everyone agrees with them, I try to share things that I think might make a difference for the readers. Whether it’s just a story about something that might make them feel good, or something to make them challenge their own mindsets, or even a look at our political world a little differently, it is one way I’m hoping to change the world. Just a little.

So if you read these, and you feel so inclined, please share them. Note that, at least for now, there is no advertising on my blog, which is actually unusual, So I don’t make any money from them, no matter how many people read them. But the more people who read them, the more I will feel I’m helping, just a little bit. And maybe, I actually will be. Assuming people continue to read them, look for more GrayShifts in the future.

So this is how I’m trying to change the world. Maybe you have some plans for doing the same.

It’s not easy to change the world. But maybe,  can do it, just a little bit.

Facebook and Me

I’m firmly convinced that one of the biggest reasons that we are a “divided nation” is because of Facebook. Pure and simple. But it’s here, and it’s a fact of life.

There’s a million flaws with what happens on Facebook, but there’s one I want to address right now.

If you post something, expect responses.

Sounds pretty simple, doesn’t it? Yet, it doesn’t work that way many times.

I don’t post that much here, but when I do, it is normally original posts. I do some shares, but not too many. Some are just fun posts (which is what I wish Facebook mostly was) but some are political. Either way, when I post something, I anticipate comments. It’s great when they agree with me, but I know many of them won’t. So when I get comments contrary to my post, I have a number of options.

I can ignore them and just let the poster speak his piece. Or I can respond. However, what I can’t do is come back at the person and tell them to stop commenting. Or to get off my page. Or try to humiliate them. Or try to get a "zinger" in. Or call them names.... You get the idea.

Yet, that’s what I see happen.

Here’s the trouble. Facebook is filled with political groups. They often post incendiary items. And a lot of those posts are slanted, or just plain lies. But people read them, and share them. If I see something which appears to me to be slanted or false, many times I comment on it. I try to point out what I perceive as falsehoods. I know this infuriates people, because we just want to believe what we already believe. When I become contrary, they don’t like it.

And I understand that. And I’m sorry. I know I can be annoying. Yet, I find it difficult to let lies or even unintentional falsehoods just go unchallenged. I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. And many times I wish I wasn’t like this. It would make my life much easier and more peaceful. And I'd get out more! Yet, this is what I am.

So if you put a political post up, expect challenges. From me, or from others.

If you don’t want challenges, then just don’t post. Seems pretty simple to me.

My Post Election Thoughts, for now

OK, the election is over. This is certainly not the outcome I had hoped for. And yeah, it really sucks. I mean really. I’ve been trying to process all this, reading a lot of stuff, listening to a lot of people. Here’s what I think.

I’ve seen a lot of pieces saying “Don’t worry, the President doesn’t really affect your own life very much. There are so many checks and balances… And really, what’s more important is your local government, your teacher…" Normally, I would agree with that. But not this time.

Checks and balances?. After this election, Republicans basically run this country. Not only did they win the presidency, but they also have control of both houses of congress. Soon the Supreme Court will be conservative as well. And don’t forget, the Republicans control about 70% of the state houses, and 70% of the governorships. Have no doubt, the country is owned by the Republicans. I don’t see a lot of checks and balances here. I can only hope that sane republicans fight against an insane president. But I don’t hold out a lot of hope on that.

And as far as the “the president doesn’t really affect your life much,” here is part of an article I saw on facebook:

“People are scared they will lose their health insurance. People are scared that their skin color will make them unwelcome in the country. They're scared that hate crimes will be on the rise because the vote justified it in the eyes of the racists. (Some white supremacists took this vote as a thumbs up. That's a reality.) LGBT friends are left wondering whether their marriages will still be legal. And whether their children will still be both of theirs legally if the marriage is undone”
(see the complete post below)

Also, a retired friend of mine on Obamacare was trying to figure out if he needed to get a full time job now, just for health care.

These are real fears. And I just pointed to a few. There are lots more. Lots. Maybe they’re imagined, and maybe they won’t come to pass. But to these people, the fears are real.

And no, this is not just because their side lost. This is not a football game. A Romney presidency would not have caused nearly as many of these fears. But this is different. It doesn’t feel like a loss, it feels like a death. This article explains it much better than I ever could.

So what to do? I have read article after article that go something like this:

“Like it or not, Trump is now OUR president. You have to accept him as such, because the people have spoken. Don’t put party first, put America first and we should all work together to move this country along.”

Really? Accept him as our president? I understand that, I really do. But let me remind everyone. When Barack Obama was elected, Trump himself didn’t accept him as president. He said that Obama was born in Kenya, so was therefore an illegitimate president. Trump himself was the number one repudiator of Obama’s presidency. But now we’re supposed to accept him? And work together? Just like the Republicans didn't do with Obama? We haven’t forgotten that the GOP spent 8 years obstructing every single piece of legislation or judgeship that came their way. But now, we’re supposed to work together? Really?

If the last 15 years have taught me anything about politics, it’s that working together gets you defeated. I hate to say that, and it shouldn’t be that way, but that’s what happens. After unprecedented obstructionism, the Republicans own the country. Yet the Democrats are now supposed to be nice and “just get along” and “be the better person.”

I like taking the high road as much as the next guy, but I’m having a little trouble with that this time. This is going to take me some time to process.

Why Isn't This a Bigger Story?

Recently, a 46 year-old white man gunned down two white police officers in Iowa. It has, of course, made headlines. But just three days later, it is off google news. I couldn’t find it on Fox or CNN either. This wouldn’t be a big deal, except for what it doesn’t involve.

It doesn’t involve a black man killing two police officers. And it doesn’t involve a Muslim killing two police officers.

Before I go further, this is not a “the media is so biased” story. Honestly, for the most part, I think most of the main stream media, with some obvious exceptions, do their best to get stories accurate. But I think this story has died, not because the media doesn’t care, but because readers don’t care. Could be wrong. But let me continue.

If this had been a Muslim killing police officers, it would have been a story for weeks. And the killing would have been termed “terrorism.” Fox News of course, would have had constant coverage of this crime. In fact, while I did not see it myself, I have read that on Wednesday when this killing was first reported, it was all over Fox and other conservative outlets; but when the shooter was found to be white, the story dropped. I can’t verify that first hand, so I might be wrong. But it does come from sources I trust.

Remember the San Bernardino shootings (Muslim shooter)? Or Baton Rouge (African American shooter)? It seems we had long lasting stories about each of those, especially San Bernardino.

But what I find even more disturbing about this story are the facts that weren’t anywhere near the headlines, and sometimes left out completely. I often wonder if major media outlets realize that many people only look at headlines of articles. Certainly anything past the first paragraph or so is ignored by many. Some people only read a story until it confirms what they want it to say. When it does, or when it doesn’t, they move on.

For instance, the killer had been ejected from a high school football game not three weeks earlier. He was waving a Confederate flag in front of a section of black spectators and the police escorted him out. He made a video of the confrontation, put it on youtube, and sent it to a television station: not just the incident, but also a 10 minute argument he had with police. He was angry with the police for kicking him out, because “he was just exercising his constitutional rights.”

A week later, the killer followed a group of African American parents into another football game, accompanied by his dog which was wearing a gun holster and a Confederate flag vest.(1)

Finally, the first killing took place on the same corner as the football stadium.

Oh, and of course, there was also the fact that he had a huge “Trump/Prence” sign in his yard.

Maybe you already know these things. But I don’t think most people do. In fact, I first discovered most of them by reading a newspaper from Jamaica! I did find corroboration of most of these things from other sources, but it was hard to find. So while some of these facts might be wrong, I’m pretty sure they are correct.

This man certainly had multiple family and employment issues as well. But to me, this sure sounds racially motivated. It sounds, although I can’t prove it, as though the killer was retaliating against the police for siding with the African Americans in the crowd. He was frustrated with that, and frustrated that the TV station didn’t do anything with his story. And given the political climate in this country, with a major candidate legitimizing racism and bigotry, intentionally or not, this kind of killing doesn’t surprise me. Unfortunately.

You can’t convince me that if he had been African American, if he had been Muslim, or even if there were a Hillary sign in his yard, this wouldn’t be a bigger story.

Apparently, we care a lot less about crimes committed by white people, especially men. I just really don’t see any other way to interpret it.

Trump Things (Almost) Nobody Talks About

Ok, the election is in a few days. Nothing I say here will change anyone’s mind. And besides, I don’t exactly have a million people reading this. But I just have to say these things anyway. If you're voting for Trump and you're reading this, good for you. I hope we can still be friends!

First of all, let’s forget about the cheating on the taxes and the sexual predator. Or the fact that he lies. A lot. Not that those things aren’t important; they are. But everyone knows about them, and has their minds made up. Anyway, here are a few things people don’t talk about much.

Trade Policy
Well that sounds boring enough, doesn’t it? But let’s think about this. He says he’s going to put huge tariffs on imported Chinese and Mexican goods. Because their manufacturing puts ours out of business. Sounds good: “Yeah, stick it to those Chinese. We need American made stuff!” The trouble is, a tariff is an added tax on these imports. So he wants to put a 45% tariff on imported goods from China, 35% from Mexico, plus other tariffs for other countries. Now everything from China will cost a lot more. Do you like the dollar store? It won’t exist. Like good prices at Walmart or Meijer? They’re going to be a lot higher. Like buying American cars? They have lots of foreign parts. Those prices are going to go way up as well. Think the cost of living is high now? Just wait. Want a recession? Well, you got it. Yes, we all wish more things were made in America, but this is not the way to do it.

Climate
Trump can’t do a lot of the things he says he’s going to do. He obviously doesn’t really understand how government works. He sometimes behaves as if he’s running for emperor, not president. But there are things he can do. And messing with climate change is an easy one. He can’t get rid of the EPA alone, but if he asks congress to do it, and if the congress is largely republican, do you really think too many of the republicans in congress are going to stand up for the EPA? Not a chance. Or how about the new Paris climate change agreement? He doesn’t need any approval for that one. It will just be negated. After all, he says climate change is a hoax. We all know better, whether we like it or not. If you want to make sure the worst of climate change is going to happen, then vote for Trump. After all, who needs cities like Miami, NY, or LA? Just let them flood. It won’t happen for quite a few years, so what do we care?

Discrimination
Recently a predominantly black church was burned, and painted with “Vote Trump.” No, Trump didn’t do it, but these are the kind of people who follow him. Yesterday, a middle aged white male with a huge Trump sign in his yard, and who likes to carry a Confederate flag, murdered two police officers, somehow because the killer hated the BLM movement (as does Trump). And no, again Trump didn’t tell him to. But his act of terrorism seems to go hand in hand with what Trump says. And Trump’s constant put down of Muslims, African Americans, and anyone who isn’t white, has a toll. His supporters (disciples?) see that, and now it is just a little more OK to be that way. Don’t think this kind of stuff will go way up? Think again.

Freedom of the press
I find this one very chilling. Trump routinely calls out the press for being biased against him. That’s bad enough when he says it in a general way. But when he points to a particular reporter and says she’s bad, she’s the worst, that will have an effect. All the reporters say it doesn’t bother them, but they have to say that. It has to make them a little concerned, and to think twice about what they're writing. And when he calls all journalists crooked scum, even if nobody hurts the journalists, it encourages his followers to ignore what the press says. That way, Trump can say his version of the truth. I’ve seen enough quotes from Trump supporters to know that many of them only believe him already. All the rest of the press lies, they think. This to me is very scary. It sets Trump as an authoritarian like this country has never seen. He has shown he will do everything he can to control the press. Just like his Putin does. I don’t know what you think, but it sure scares me.

Corruption
Yes, he says Hilary is corrupt. Maybe she is, but I’m pretty sure when all is said and done, we’ll find she hasn’t done all that much wrong. But Donald? Late in the month, his trial for fraud concerning Trump University begins. (BTW, the judge handling this case scheduled it for late November so it wouldn’t interfere with the election. Think how this election would be different if we were hearing all this testimony against Trump…. But back to the point.) If you’ve read anything about Trump U, you know it was a complete fraud. If he’s willing to do that, what makes anyone think he’s going to be honest in Washington? Or how about the multitudes of people he has stiffed after they did work for him? Or how about the fact he gives almost nothing to charity, yet tells people he does? (Sometimes his foundation gives money, but that’s not his money.) That’s other people’s money. (My favorite story is here. Amazing.) Finally, just think if we had all his emails and communication for the last 10 years like we have of Hillary’s. Do you think he’s going to be looking good? Not a chance.

I could go on, but this is too long already. But the whole idea of a Trump presidency really scares me. If you're still here, thank you for reading.

Rude is the New Cool

“Rude” has somehow become the new cool. Except we don’t call it “rude” anymore. We call it “telling it like it is” or “speaking your mind.” Or “not worrying about all that politically correct shit.” That sounds good, except mostly it’s just plain rude.

I’ve noticed, on social media especially but not exclusively, that it is now acceptable, even preferred by many, to say as many nasty things as possible, trying to score points. Or something. In fact, a lot of people are especially happy when they think they’ve offended someone. In their line of thinking, by offending someone, they’ve proven they’re not being “politically correct.” Because, as the reasoning continues, those who are “politically correct” are weak/afraid/timid/stupid. (Feel free to pick your own adjective.) And they are convinced that being PC is somehow what’s wrong with America. So by being rude and acting like a jerk, they are making America better somehow…in their line of thinking anyway.

Maybe, but sometimes being politically correct is just being a decent human being.

I have a lot of nasty things I could say about people on facebook, or in person. I could call them names, or put them down, or “tell it like it is.” But I don’t, or at least I try not to. I was taught to be respectful and polite. And that if I hurt someone else, either physically or emotionally, that was a bad thing. And when I did those things as a kid, I had to go apologize. I’m sorry if that seems old fashioned. But if it does seem old fashioned, that’s also a little disappointing.

Now we have politicians, and others, who specialize in putting people down. They love doing it, and their fans love them for it. When they criticize someone, these fans cheer. Loudly. Instead of being turned off by these people, many idolize them. Their fans somehow think this makes these people tough, or brave. Because they “tell it like it is.” Even when they are obviously lying. But they’re not telling it like it is, they’re just being jerks. If I spoke like them, and my mom were alive today, she’d still try to wash my mouth out with soap!

But apparently most of these people didn’t have a mom like mine. Or they’ve forgotten.

If you think this kind of behavior is cool; if you feel a secret pride when you think you’ve offended someone; if you cheer a public figure who enjoys putting others down; if your goal on facebook is to get a “zinger” in or humiliate someone; if you call people you don’t agree with names (like Killary, or libtard, or…); if any of these things apply to you, then you probably feel pretty proud that you “tell it like it is.”

But really, you’re just an asshole.

(Sorry Mom, I just couldn’t help myself.)

Safe

Yesterday I was out for a run, an activity I do much less often than I should. It was a beautiful day, and I headed out for a little more than five miles. When I was about a mile from home, I found myself at the pier where the Portage River meets Lake Erie. It’s nice to run out along it. While the footing is a little tricky, it’s incredibly rewarding. River to the left of me, lake to the right, and sun all around: what more could I ask for?

As I approached the end of the pier, I had to stop, because the pier is being rebuilt. There was this big crane on a barge, taking rocks from the pier and trying, in some way I didn’t quite understand, to rebuild it. I watched for quite a while. The barge with the crane, another barge with lots of rocks, and the beautiful day.

Then one of those “feelings” came over me, which sometimes happens a few miles into a run. I watched the barge, flying two American flags. And I realized: I’m lucky. With all the crap that’s going on in the world, I live in a nation where I’m very safe. Yes, someone could have gunned me down I suppose, a terrorist could have launched an attack, or the Russians could have declared war on us, but those possibilities are extremely rare in this country. In a word, I felt “safe.”

And I was thankful for all the past and present government leaders, soldiers, and zillions of other people who allowed me to feel that way. But then I got scared, really, not a lot, but a little. Because while the USA doesn’t do everything right in the world, we do most things right. And because of that, I feel safe from terrorists, foreign attackers, and nuclear war. But when I thought of the election, and I thought of the possibility of Trump in the White House, that safe feeling left me.

Say what you want about the man, there is no denying that when he gets mad, he immediately tries to get even. And while that admittedly sometimes seems cool, for a world leader it is incredibly dangerous. He got into  a twitter war about a beauty queen. And way more worrisome, is that he doesn't seem to believe the intelligence briefings he's given. He just doesn't want to know about the world, because he knows "better than the generals?" I'm not sure. But what would happen if some foreign leader really pissed him off? I just don’t believe he would suddenly find that not acting impulsively would be the best response. Nuclear war? Doubtful, but not all that unlikely. A war because his feelings got hurt? Very likely.

Say what you want about Obama, but we've been relatively safe during his terms. And think what you want about Clinton, but she has her own qualities. No, she doesn’t have the charisma of Obama, or even the folksy charm of Bush. But she is far from impulsive. In fact, one of the criticisms people have about her is that she’s not spontaneous enough: she studies and thinks through absolutely everything before she acts. And that doesn’t make her exciting or particularly cool, or even an effective campaigner. But as for me, that’s the kind of president I really want.

Feel free to disagree with me. It's OK, and I won't be offended. But as I stood there watching the men on the crane do their work, I liked that “safe” feeling. And I’m not interested in giving it up any time soon.

And even if there were no other reasons, that one is enough for me. Which is why I already voted, early.

I'm sure you know how I voted.

Millennials

Millennials: those 20-something (mostly) people. We all know them. We’ve all read about them. We all have an opinion. And most of us baby boomers have a pretty harsh opinion, at that. They’re lazy. They’re entitled. They just want stuff handed to them. Maybe, for some. But mostly I disagree.

Every single millennial I know is incredibly hard-working. It seems they always have at least one job, sometimes two. Now, they may not be the best paying jobs. In fact, they’re usually not. What boomers seem to forget, is that things were way different back when we came of age. Most of us got out of school, and got a job, in the field we wanted. And that job usually paid enough that we could rent an apartment (of our own!) and maybe buy a good used car, or maybe even a very cheap new one. We weren’t rich, and we couldn’t buy a house right away, but we could survive. That isn’t true for millennials. The job market is just not the same. Sure there are jobs, but a good number of graduates now don’t get work in their field. So they take on something different, whatever they can get actually. And it’s usually pretty low paying. Also, when I was in college, I made enough money in the summer to pay for my tuition (though not room and board) for the entire year. That can't happen anymore. Tuition has risen so much, and summer wages have mostly stagnated. So many graduates now have tons of student debt. This is something we had no concept of.

So it's not surprising that many millennials move back home. Or share an apartment with two or three roommates. They really don’t have much choice. They don’t have enough money to do much else.

But on the other hand, there are things about millennials that I do have trouble with. First of all, they spend more at restaurants than we ever did. Taco Bell and McDonald's have been replaced with Starbucks and Chipotle (or some other restaurants that I'm not cool enough to know about!) A $12 burger isn’t uncommon.  They also drink better beer. Yes, PBR has made a comeback, (for which I’m grateful!) but also craft beers at $6 a glass are pretty common too. And finally, they travel way more than we ever did. It’s not unusual to hear of a recent college graduate take a three week trip to Europe “just to relax.” Or maybe Asia, or just a short jaunt down to the Caribbean. Trust me, that’s something we never did. Didn’t even consider it. So yes, they do spend more than we did.

But on the other hand again, my parents said the same thing about us: that we spent too much money and didn’t work hard enough. My dad always seemed annoyed that I didn't always have a summer job; I think he thought I was pretty lazy. And I remember one time when I was just starting out, in my first year of teaching, and my parents came up to visit. My dad saw an 8-pack of Pepsi in the kitchen. And he immediately said “What’s that?” Like it was some kind of accusation or something. So I said “It’s Pepsi!” His response was classic. In fact, I’m pretty sure I remember it word for word. “Pop? You have pop? We couldn’t afford pop when we were your age!” And he shook his head with disgust. And yes, that’s a true story.

And finally, if millennials really are as bad as some say, whose fault is it? We are the ones that raised them, that gave them their ideas and values. I really don’t think there was a mass set of mutations that caused these people to be different. No, it’s what they learned from their parents, teachers, and other role models. So if they’re lazy and entitled, let’s look at who taught them to be this way.

Maybe I’m wrong, and feel free to disagree with me, but this has been my experience. In all seriousness though, I think part of the backlash against millennials is part of the “blame someone else for the world’s troubles” idea that we as Americans seem to have. We never want to take the responsibility ourselves, so it’s always someone else’s fault: millennials, immigrants, people of color, welfare queens, people of the LGBT community, democrats, republicans….  You get the idea.

Now, if there are any millennials reading this, this isn’t an excuse to be lazy! Keep working hard, keep trying for the career you want, and never ever settle. Really, don’t ever, ever settle.

It may take a longer than it you would like, but you’ll get there.

A Broken World?

A Broken World. Really? Yesterday I heard two different people refer to “our broken world.” One of the speakers, I think, was referring to our world from a Christian viewpoint: this is a broken world because we are sinners, and cannot match the perfection of God. And I understand that view. Because yes, we are all sinners. And yes, we are many times poor excuses for good people.

But the other speaker seemed to have a different meaning. I think he meant this is a broken world, because we have really just gone off the rails, and what used to be a wonderful world is now a complete mess. And it occurred to me, I don’t agree with it.

I know it’s popular to characterize our world as broken. It’s a mess, filled with evil people. It’s not like it used to be when we had law and order. Our country is lost, the world is in shambles, and compared to some time ago, there is so much less respect, integrity, character, and decency. The world has basically degenerated, and we need somebody to take it all by the reins, punish the bad guys, and make it all better.

You know, I’m not normally known as an optimist, but I am in this respect. Is the world really broken? I don’t buy it. I know sometimes it seems bad. Yes, we have lots of murders and terrorist attacks, but they don't compare to the loss of life in the huge wars we've had in the past. The economy isn’t great, but it’s a lot better than it was a few years ago. We have race problems, to be sure, but as bad as it seems sometimes, in comparison to the 1950’s, I think we’re improving. Of course, a complete discussion of this would take volumes, but that’s for another time.

But last night I saw an episode of “The West WIng.” (Season 4, Episode 2 for those who watch.) And in it, there had been a bombing of a college swim team. Forty-four students were killed. I know this is a TV show, a fictional story about a fictional president. But I couldn’t help but be struck by how this fictional president handled this tragedy. This fictional president lifted everyone up, made us optimistic, gave us hope, while still facing the problem. I think our current actual president does his best to do that as well, with varying degrees of success. But sometimes, people just want to fill us all with fear, despair, and anger, trying to divide us and pit one group against another.

But I’m just really tired of hearing it, and reading it. In person, on bumper stickers. On Facebook. Online. Everywhere. Apparently, lots of people want to spread this idea. And oddly, just as many want to hear it. They want to fear. They want to think the world is horrible. They want to think it’s all so bad.

But you know, they can go ahead and think the world is broken. And feel depressed and angry. It’s their life, and it’s their right. But as for me, I’ll look at the world through what I feel are honest eyes, and see that no, the world isn’t perfect, but we’ve made a lot of progress in making it better. And if we work together rather than against each other, if we lift each other up rather than tear each other down, we can make it better still.  I say that because I’m really, really tired of the negativity and pessimism I see everyday in every kind of media. But I also say it because it’s truth.

Call me an optimist or a fool, take your pick. But maybe I’m just a realist.

Old Man Running

So this morning I ran a race. Well, it was called a race, and I participated in it. And I finished it. And I even beat some people. And I was real tired when I got done. So I guess it actually was a race.

There’s a reason I hesitate to call it a race, though. It’s because I still haven’t gotten used to this “old man running” thing. I mean, I finished in 27:08, which honestly was way better than I thought I would, so I’m not complaining. But back in the day, I would watch people run 27 minutes for a 5k, and wonder how they could possibly be so slow? Yeah, I know, I was young and foolish. But now that I’m old and foolish, I know how slow I must have looked this morning.

But there were some victories in the race. First of all, I beat all of the walkers, so that’s a good thing! And while the results aren’t posted yet, I’m pretty sure I finished in the middle of the pack for the runners, so like I said, I’m not complaining. But I used to really RUN. The gun would go off, and I would take off so fast I’d be at the mile mark before I realized I was tired (OK, that’s a bit of an exaggeration.) Now, about 30 years later, my races aren’t anything like that. Nope, not even close.

But in my mind, I’m just cranking. During the last mile, I caught 5 people who had been pretty far ahead of me. I could feel myself almost “sprinting, or hopefully “gliding,” or at least “striding.” But I’m sure it looked a little different. I don’t think I’m quite at a shuffle yet, but give me a few years!

The worst part of the race? Right about the .75 mile mark, this little kid passed me, maybe 12 or 13 years old. I could tell he wasn’t a runner, and I knew he’d start to walk. Well, when he got about 20 yards in front of me, he did just that. That’s the good news. The bad news is, that while he was walking and I was running, I wasn’t really gaining on him! Ugh. But eventually I did get by him.

The best part of the race? Well, the finish of course, passing those people. Except I think I kinda blew it. As I turned the final corner with about 150 yards, to go, there was a guy about 10 yards ahead of me. I knew that I should go after him, just because. (Mitch would!) Well, I didn’t, then I didn’t some more, and then with about 30 yards left, I broke into my sprint (or maybe a fast shuffle!) and started to catch him. But I didn’t want to sneak up on him and pass him at the line; that seemed kinda poor-sport-ish of me. So instead I yelled at him “I'm coming!” Like three times. I figured he’d take off. Instead, he just moved aside and let me pass him. I was trying to be nice and give him some warning, but I’m sure that when I said “I’m coming” he took it as “I’m coming you little twit, and I’m going to run your worthless butt into the ground you wretched scum.” Or something like that. He probably thinks I’m the biggest jerk in the world. Sorry.

I even wore the Sandbagger colors. And was recognized by them, which is always cool. Sandbaggers are famous around here, apparently.

OK, but back to this “Old Man Running” thing. No, I’m not used to it yet. I still can’t believe how slow my normal runs are. But while I don’t really accept it, I’m not ashamed of it either. Yes, I know my “strides” are more like “shuffles.” And yes, I run about 3 minutes per mile slower than I used to. And no, I’ll never get another PR. But slow as it may be, and as “Old Man Running” as I look, the good thing is: I’m still running.

And for that, I’m incredibly grateful.

Retired...

I retired about 3 years ago, after 35 years of teaching. The best career move I ever made! I go to bed when I want, I get up when I want (usually) and for the most part I do what I want. Compared to the whirlwind of busy that came with teaching and coaching, this is really a breeze, and I would never ever in a million years go back. Still…

Last week was a miserable week of weather. Cold and rainy all week, then capped off with about 8 inches of snow on Saturday. I hated it, like most of us. But I couldn’t help thinking that while it was disgusting, it didn’t really affect me like it did when I was a track coach. I made a facebook post to that effect, and I got lots of responses from former runners of mine. Which got me thinking about back then...

Reminiscing is always dangerous, because we tend to look back at the past with blinders on. We remember the good parts, and probably play up the “good” just a bit too much. And we remember the bad parts too, but we normally play the "bad" down, thinking “well it wasn’t so bad.” Yet...

No, I would never go back. Teaching was great, and coaching was wonderful. But the time, the energy, the dedication it took to be effective; well, I don’t think I could do that anymore. It makes me tired to just think about it! Still…

I have to say, there are times when I look back on those times, and I miss them. And I think I know why. First of all, I miss some of my best friends, dreadfully, and while I see them periodically, it’s not nearly the same as sharing everything, good times and bad, celebrations and disappointments. But there’s more than that. It’s the same reason so many new retirees find one thing after another to fill their time. It’s not because of boredom, although that’s what they may say. No, I think it’s really because they miss feeling useful.

When I was teaching and coaching, if I had been hit by a bus and killed instantly, everything I was involved with would have been turned completely upside down. Nobody could do the things I did; nobody knew how. And honestly, nobody even really knew what all those things were. And that’s not just me; that’s probably true with most people. Eventually, of course, they would have figured it out, as they did when I finally retired. After all, nobody is actually irreplaceable.

But even more than that, the thing I enjoyed most about teaching and coaching, is that I made a difference in so many lives. I affected a lot of people. Yes, I made a difference. That is such an emotional experience, it’s not surprising that I miss that.

I love retirement, and I would never go back. Still...

The Teachers' Lounge

Recently, I saw a Facebook post concerning teachers. The poster talked about the wonderful teachers he had had. But when he became a teacher, he found many teachers gossiped and talked badly about students in the lounge. He seemed disappointed.

I spent a lifetime teaching, so I’m acquainted with teachers’ lounges. And my response was “What did he expect?” These teachers who “gossiped and talked badly” about students may actually have been wonderful teachers.  I know a bunch of teachers who were sometimes unbearable in the teachers’ lounge but were in fact excellent teachers. And I can pretty much guarantee that his “wonderful teachers” behaved very similarly when they were around other teachers.

Most teachers I know are dedicated, hard-working individuals. But we all have our own internal filters. These filters tell us what we should or shouldn’t say in any social situation. While I tried very hard to be the same person to my students as I was with my friends, there are still things I just couldn’t do or say. When a teacher is with his students, it is normally not a good idea, for instance, to talk about religion, politics, sex, or any of a zillion other topics. And also a good teacher will most likely go out of her way not to berate a student, even when a student is being a complete jerk, or just having one of those “where is his brain?” moments. As teachers, we filter those things.

But when we’re with our own peers, those filters change. We can say, and show, a lot more than we can when around students. So when in the teachers’ lounge, complaining just happens. Yes, it can get out of hand. And yes, it would be better, I suppose, if teachers didn’t engage in that kind of behavior. But for the most part, it is a time when teachers let their filters go, and “blow off steam” so to speak. It really doesn’t make them any less teachers.

I’ve been told funeral personnel are the same way. I’m pretty sure they aren’t sad all the time. I’m sure that sometimes they are treating the grieving family one way, but then are completely different with their colleagues. It doesn’t mean they’re bad. It means they’re human. And they have to let those filters down sometimes.

Most of us have done this: we get bad service from someone at a store, then we get out into our car and complain about “that stupid clerk” or whatever. In this case, our car is our “teachers’ lounge.” No difference.

But you know, there are some people with no filters at all. We’ve all heard people say something like “I tell it like I see it. I don’t care what people think. I’m tired of this politically correct crap.” Well, first of all, normally they don’t mean it. They still do have some filters; they just don’t like to admit it.

But there are some who really do mean it, and don’t filter anything. They say whatever they think. They would actually call that clerk above “stupid.” Some people admire these unfiltered people. They call them genuine, and true. But these people aren’t “genuine” or “true.” No, these people are “jerks.”  (which is the nicest word I could use in a family -friendly blog.) Because filtering our behavior in public is not about being politically correct, or untrue, or fake, or caring about what people think. It’s just being considerate. It’s about treating other humans with decency and respect.

But there are instances when we actually need no filters. When we are with someone who we can be with and have absolutely no filters, that’s the best situation ever. It allows us to be completely comfortable and perfectly at ease. We can be our absolute selves, we can relax, and life is good!

Those people are what we call “best friends.”

Scientific, not Political

Climate change. This is a scientific topic. At least it should be. Unfortunately, in today's world, it has become a political topic. Which is sad, unfortunate, bewildering, and dangerous. Because, while climate change could turn out to be a minor problem, it also could turn out to be the biggest threat modern man has ever known.

Am I exaggerating? Actually, I don’t know. Nobody does for sure. Which is, of course, the problem. While there are many different views on climate change, one thing that almost everyone agrees on is that to stop, reduce, or minimize it, is going to be a very difficult problem. So if it turns out that it’s not a big threat, then we’ve made a mountain out of a mole hill. But if, as most scientists believe, it can become catastrophic, then we really have to do whatever is necessary, whatever the effort, at whatever the cost.

Ignore the news organizations and the politicians on this one. Check out scientific websites. While news and political websites are debating whether climate change actually exists, the scientific websites are posting study after study and article after article, of the present and future effects, causes, and treatments of this problem. Honestly, it’s almost as if there are two mutually exclusive worlds: the scientific one where people study and discuss a scientific issue; and the non-scientific, everyday world where people are arguing if it’s a hoax or not. It’s baffling to me that these two can coexist.

And the oddest thing about this? The people who don’t believe in climate change tend to be the same people who seem to have a complete distrust of government and news media. Yet, in this case, they’re ignoring the scientific community and trusting their favorite politicians and news sources. How does this make sense? Honestly, I don’t get it.

Examples? At Phys.org I found at least 10 articles discussing climate change, as casually as they discuss geologic history or the flow of the Colorado river. Or go to NOAA.gov, ScienceNews.org, or any of a million others. And yes, 2015 set another record for the warmest year on record, and by a record largest margin.

Sure, you can find scientists who dispute this. But you can find scientists who dispute that cigarettes are harmful, too. Yet a huge majority of scientists agree that this is a problem, caused at least partly by humans, that is likely to cause us big problems down the line.

I remember when I first started teaching almost forty years ago, I talked about global warming and the greenhouse effect. I taught it because it was science, just like the atomic theory, Newtonian mechanics, and stoichiometry. Now just because it’s science, however, doesn’t mean it’s all correct. But it does normally represent our best ideas based on the data we have. In 1980, this wasn’t controversial. Somehow, now it is.

If you search the web, you'll find many articles and blogs that say pretty much the same as this one. But apparently, nobody is listening. Because most of our government representatives either believe climate change is a hoax, or ignore it. And while the democratic candidates discuss it somewhat, the republican candidates pretty much ignore it.

You know, a day might come when we look back and say “Why didn’t we do something?” But by then, it will probably be too late. My children will, unfortunately, probably see that day. There is a good chance that I won’t.

But then again, I might.

I Miss the Old Internet

Today I was online, and I saw a reference to an article about a better way to use old unused binders (notebooks). OK, that made sense, as I have a few of those. So I clicked on the link, and I was sent to a page, not with information about binders, but with an entire slideshow about “life hacks.” Not only did I not care about a slideshow of “life hacks,” if I had gone through with it, I would have had to click through probably 20 pages of things I didn’t care about, each page taking forever to load, just to get to the one thing I wanted. But I didn’t go through with it, because it loaded so slowly, I got tired of waiting for it to load, so I gave up and closed the tab. And why? Because of the ads… hundreds of them. Which of course is why almost nothing on the internet is given in a list; instead, information is given one page at a time, each one loading agonizingly slowly, so I can be bombarded with ads.

Or how about this one? I’m sure you’ve experienced this. You see a news article you want to read. So you click on it. The article shows up for about 1 second, then the screen is covered with some ad for the news source, and if you’re patient, you can click on through in 5...4...3...2...1. Finally you get to the page, and you start reading. But as you’re reading, all of a sudden the text moves down, out of view, while an ad loads, usually a video. And then the ad starts playing. You search for your text, and when you find it and try to start reading again, the video is still playing. Sometimes you can mute the video, sometimes you can’t. When the video is done, it disappears, and your text jumps back up, and you lose your place all over again. Or sometimes two videos start playing at the same time, fighting each other. So, many times, if you’re like me, you give up and just close the page.

You know, it wasn’t always like this. “Back in the day” it was possible to actually use the internet. Directly. Without being bombarded with ads. Now don’t get me wrong. I understand the need for ads. It costs money for an organization to sponsor a web page, and that money has to come from somewhere. And I know that America, being the land of the free, allows and encourages capitalism and all that goes with it, such as incredible numbers of ads. But that doesn’t mean I have to like it. But I get it. Still, sometimes I really think it has just run amok. Yes, I can use adblockers, but those don’t always work particularly well either.

When I took my first internet design course, back in the mid 90’s, one of the cardinal rules was to never, never, never embed video or audio that would start playing by itself. It was considered too rude. Well, today’s internet doesn’t care about rude. And while I’m talking about the 90’s, “back in the day,” my internet speed was less than 10% as fast as it is today, but since 90% of the stuff that comes across is advertisements, it doesn’t really seem any faster. I just pay Time Warner more.

I don’t know the answer. But I do think that if the companies cared, they could make the ads just as effective but less intrusive. My facebook feed has ads, and while I don’t like them, they don’t normally ruin the experience. Google’s products all have ads ( which I why they’re free) but somehow the ads don’t get in the way. Amazon’s site is nothing but ads, yet it still works well. But companies, for the most part, don’t care. As long as they make their bucks.

Unfortunately, I know it’s not ever going to get any better. So this is probably just a “grayshift” old-guy rant about “the good old days.” Maybe it is. Still, I’m not normally one for nostalgia. I’m not one of those who think everything was better way back when.

But some things were.

So I’m a Freshman All Over Again

Recently, I started back to college. Sorta. Actually, I’m taking one class at Terra State Community College. I found out that old people like me can audit courses at state institutions in Ohio tuition-free. Even though I had to pay some fees and books, it was still a deal. So I decided to take a beginning web design course. Since I do a few websites for friends, and I could definitely do them better, it made since. And I have the time.

But that meant, of course, that I had to start school all over again, with a bunch of 19 year-olds, at a place that was new to me. But I signed up, registered for the class, and paid, all in about an hour, in a small building where I was the only person in line. Not exactly like I remember from the University of Toledo in the 1970’s! That was the easy part.

Then came the part I was afraid of: The first day of school! So, just to start off right (not) I went to the wrong class. Of course. Of course! When the teacher there informed me I was in the right room, but the wrong building, I did my best to pretend all was cool, all the time feeling like an idiot, but trying not to LOOK like I was feeling like an idiot. Well, I got to the right building, and do you think I could find room 210? Of course not. OK, yes I did, but not without a lot of looking. All I know is it wasn’t where the signs said it was. And how come I was the only one looking lost, walking around in circles, staring at signs and room numbers? But I got there, walked in, and even though I was early, there were already about 10 students in there, logged in and working on the computers. (What is going on here? What are they working on?) Anyway, I figured out how to log in, and pretended I was doing something, just so I didn’t look so out of place…which I already did being 3 times the age of the rest of the students.

Finally, the class started, and the instructor started talking about the syllabus he put online. Wait, what? There’s a syllabus? I actually had looked online the night before and there was nothing. Of course, I looked at 8:00, a proper time for old guys like me. He put it up around 11 he said. 11? PM? Really? Really. Doesn’t he know I’m old? And I don’t stay up as late as they do? No, of course not. But since I didn’t see the syllabus, I also didn’t see the part where it told me to bring a flash drive. So then he asks “Who doesn’t have a flash drive?” He might as well have asked “Who is an idiot I can point out to everyone so we can make him feel stupid?” Meekly, my hand, and my hand alone, was raised. Crap. I think I had just been tagged as the doddering old guy in the back row. Crap. Crap…Crap. I hate doddering.

But eventually, the class was over, and except for the fact that I was the only one who had to bring separate reading glasses, I made it back to my truck with no more issues. Finally!

All in all, I guess it could have been worse. My very first day of college, 40 years ago, I dropped my cafeteria tray at my very first meal. At least this wasn’t that bad.

Still, I made sure I didn’t go to the snack bar. I didn’t want to take any chances.