I Miss the Old Internet

Today I was online, and I saw a reference to an article about a better way to use old unused binders (notebooks). OK, that made sense, as I have a few of those. So I clicked on the link, and I was sent to a page, not with information about binders, but with an entire slideshow about “life hacks.” Not only did I not care about a slideshow of “life hacks,” if I had gone through with it, I would have had to click through probably 20 pages of things I didn’t care about, each page taking forever to load, just to get to the one thing I wanted. But I didn’t go through with it, because it loaded so slowly, I got tired of waiting for it to load, so I gave up and closed the tab. And why? Because of the ads… hundreds of them. Which of course is why almost nothing on the internet is given in a list; instead, information is given one page at a time, each one loading agonizingly slowly, so I can be bombarded with ads.

Or how about this one? I’m sure you’ve experienced this. You see a news article you want to read. So you click on it. The article shows up for about 1 second, then the screen is covered with some ad for the news source, and if you’re patient, you can click on through in 5...4...3...2...1. Finally you get to the page, and you start reading. But as you’re reading, all of a sudden the text moves down, out of view, while an ad loads, usually a video. And then the ad starts playing. You search for your text, and when you find it and try to start reading again, the video is still playing. Sometimes you can mute the video, sometimes you can’t. When the video is done, it disappears, and your text jumps back up, and you lose your place all over again. Or sometimes two videos start playing at the same time, fighting each other. So, many times, if you’re like me, you give up and just close the page.

You know, it wasn’t always like this. “Back in the day” it was possible to actually use the internet. Directly. Without being bombarded with ads. Now don’t get me wrong. I understand the need for ads. It costs money for an organization to sponsor a web page, and that money has to come from somewhere. And I know that America, being the land of the free, allows and encourages capitalism and all that goes with it, such as incredible numbers of ads. But that doesn’t mean I have to like it. But I get it. Still, sometimes I really think it has just run amok. Yes, I can use adblockers, but those don’t always work particularly well either.

When I took my first internet design course, back in the mid 90’s, one of the cardinal rules was to never, never, never embed video or audio that would start playing by itself. It was considered too rude. Well, today’s internet doesn’t care about rude. And while I’m talking about the 90’s, “back in the day,” my internet speed was less than 10% as fast as it is today, but since 90% of the stuff that comes across is advertisements, it doesn’t really seem any faster. I just pay Time Warner more.

I don’t know the answer. But I do think that if the companies cared, they could make the ads just as effective but less intrusive. My facebook feed has ads, and while I don’t like them, they don’t normally ruin the experience. Google’s products all have ads ( which I why they’re free) but somehow the ads don’t get in the way. Amazon’s site is nothing but ads, yet it still works well. But companies, for the most part, don’t care. As long as they make their bucks.

Unfortunately, I know it’s not ever going to get any better. So this is probably just a “grayshift” old-guy rant about “the good old days.” Maybe it is. Still, I’m not normally one for nostalgia. I’m not one of those who think everything was better way back when.

But some things were.

So I’m a Freshman All Over Again

Recently, I started back to college. Sorta. Actually, I’m taking one class at Terra State Community College. I found out that old people like me can audit courses at state institutions in Ohio tuition-free. Even though I had to pay some fees and books, it was still a deal. So I decided to take a beginning web design course. Since I do a few websites for friends, and I could definitely do them better, it made since. And I have the time.

But that meant, of course, that I had to start school all over again, with a bunch of 19 year-olds, at a place that was new to me. But I signed up, registered for the class, and paid, all in about an hour, in a small building where I was the only person in line. Not exactly like I remember from the University of Toledo in the 1970’s! That was the easy part.

Then came the part I was afraid of: The first day of school! So, just to start off right (not) I went to the wrong class. Of course. Of course! When the teacher there informed me I was in the right room, but the wrong building, I did my best to pretend all was cool, all the time feeling like an idiot, but trying not to LOOK like I was feeling like an idiot. Well, I got to the right building, and do you think I could find room 210? Of course not. OK, yes I did, but not without a lot of looking. All I know is it wasn’t where the signs said it was. And how come I was the only one looking lost, walking around in circles, staring at signs and room numbers? But I got there, walked in, and even though I was early, there were already about 10 students in there, logged in and working on the computers. (What is going on here? What are they working on?) Anyway, I figured out how to log in, and pretended I was doing something, just so I didn’t look so out of place…which I already did being 3 times the age of the rest of the students.

Finally, the class started, and the instructor started talking about the syllabus he put online. Wait, what? There’s a syllabus? I actually had looked online the night before and there was nothing. Of course, I looked at 8:00, a proper time for old guys like me. He put it up around 11 he said. 11? PM? Really? Really. Doesn’t he know I’m old? And I don’t stay up as late as they do? No, of course not. But since I didn’t see the syllabus, I also didn’t see the part where it told me to bring a flash drive. So then he asks “Who doesn’t have a flash drive?” He might as well have asked “Who is an idiot I can point out to everyone so we can make him feel stupid?” Meekly, my hand, and my hand alone, was raised. Crap. I think I had just been tagged as the doddering old guy in the back row. Crap. Crap…Crap. I hate doddering.

But eventually, the class was over, and except for the fact that I was the only one who had to bring separate reading glasses, I made it back to my truck with no more issues. Finally!

All in all, I guess it could have been worse. My very first day of college, 40 years ago, I dropped my cafeteria tray at my very first meal. At least this wasn’t that bad.

Still, I made sure I didn’t go to the snack bar. I didn’t want to take any chances.